Bittersweet

Today is a wonderful day! It is our daughter Morgan's 10th birthday. We had the opportunity to throw her a birthday party yesterday and celebrate the day of her birth. Today is our future daughter ______'s birthday also. Last year we got to celebrate it with her, while she was visiting America. I am celebrating and sad at the same time. I wonder if anyone said "Happy Birthday" to her? I wonder if she got our gifts? I wish we could call her but she isn't available because she is at camp. Little one, we want you to know you are in our hearts right now. We are thinking about you on this day. We love you so much already and can't wait to be together as a family forever!

This is my prayer for you my little ones. I want you to know this always and take comfort that your life was not an accident. God surely does cares for you too! Someday I will read this to each of my children and prayerfully it will be a great comfort to them as it is to me.

Psalms 139:1-18 O Lord, You have searched me and know me. You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not not a word on my tongue, but behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. You have hedged my behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is high, I cannot attain it.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there Your hand shall lead me, and Your right hand shall hold me. If I say, "Surely the darkness shall fall on me," even the night shall be light about me; indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You, but the night shines as the day; the darkness and the light are both alike to You.

You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother's womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me. When as yet there were none of them. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand; When I awake, I am still with You.

Pam